Why can’t all safety briefs be like this?
A guitar strumming soldier at Joint Base Elmendorf-Richardson spiced up his safety brief with an acoustic number that cautioned, “Alaska will f—ing get you, if you drink and drive.”
Wear condoms, avoid falling for strippers and not to mess with wildlife, crooned the soldier, identified in the comments at U.S. Army WTF! moments as a member of Comanche Company 1-501st Parachute Infantry Regiment.
Though most of the lyrics are unprintable on this family blog, it’s grabbier than the average safety brief, and the nearly three-minute clip elicits peals of laughter from the off-camera crowd.
That young Paratrooper was PFC Michael Davis, he concocted the song in a desperate attempt to shorten and lively up our weekly safety briefs. We take all of the subjects covered very seriously (including strippers), but after hearing Davis’ song all I could say was “remarks complete, have a good weekend”. The mark of an effective safety brief is how often the recipients think about what was said during the weekend, and speaking for myself I was humming that stupid song all weekend and my wife happily reports I had no run ins with any strippers. Davis is a hell of a good Paratrooper and in day to day life would never be caught using any of the foul language contained in the song, but in the interest of quoting the things we repetitively say he included the language. I appreciate your recognition of him. V/R 1SG Travis Cooke, Comanche 1-501 (ABN)
Alaska will effing kill you so way to make the lesson memorable! Besides, by the title I thought it was gonna be way more profane; I didn’t think it was that bad really.